Surviving a break up in sobriety is one of the most difficult things to deal with in life. Losing someone you care about and dealing with the realization that the relationship has reached its end is a huge challenge. It doesn’t matter how tough you are or how old you are, surviving a break up in sobriety will always hurt and will always do some damage.
If you are reading this now, then more than likely you have just been hurt or have been hurt at some point in the past. It is unfortunate, but with the risk of loving someone, also comes the risk of being hurt, and when that occurs, not much else in life can rival the pain that it causes.
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However, as difficult as navigating a break up in sobriety can be, it does not need to be impossible. Under no circumstances is it necessary to go back out and use, or to act out in ways that can put in you danger. Although it may not seem like it now, the pain will pass, and with it, you will find a new sense of peace and deeper understanding of yourself, as long as you allow the process to unfold and work through it to the best of your ability.
Since we understand how difficult a break up in sobriety can be, we have compiled some survival tips on how to best handle your broken heart. These tips are meant to ensure that you don’t have to return to the bottle or the needle in order to help you deal with your emotions. Hopefully, you never have to deal with a break up in sobriety. Hopefully, you meet or have already met, the man or woman of your dreams, but in case that doesn’t occur right away, it is best to be prepared and to have the right tool at your disposal. Here are some tips to help you through a break up in sobriety.
Tips for Handling Heart Break in Sobriety
Let it Out
Did you just get your heart broken? Then let it out and cry. Once you’re done crying— cry some more. Grab some tissues, blot your eyes, blow your nose and cry some more. Get those good deep cries out, the ones where you want to stare at yourself in the mirror to see how hard you’re actually crying. Crying is natural, tears are natural and it’s all part of the healing process. Not to mention that many times after having a good cry, you will feel better. All of that pent-up emotion comes flooding out and when it’s done, and the catharsis has taken place, you will feel calmer and more at peace.
Surround Yourself with Friends
Once you’ve gotten a good share of the crying out, call up some friends. Call up your best friend and if they’re not available at that moment, call someone else that you are close to. One of the best things about being in recovery is that there is no shortage of friends or people that will be there for you when you truly need them.
If your friends can come by, have them come over. Tell them what happened and let them be there to support you. Call some other close friends or family members up and try and set a date to go out and have some fun. Getting your mind off of your ex is going to help a lot. Go bowling, go out to eat, go to the movies, play some board games, do whatever you can to keep yourself busy, because dwelling in your own pit of misery is not helpful to anyone.
Don’t Actively Try to Find a Replacement
People aren’t like light bulbs or batteries. You shouldn’t be able to replace them easily. If you are truly heartbroken then don’t try and hide your pain by finding a replacement. You need to process the pain properly and deal with the loss of that part of your life. Movies and TV shows always talk about a rebound, but that has to do more with desires than feelings. For the most part, allowing yourself to experience the grief, rather than attempting to cover it up with another relationship is the best course of action, but each person has their own journey and what is right for one may not be right for all.
If you are financially able to go splurge on that purse or a new pair of Jordan’s you’ve been wanting, then do it. Don’t spend to the point where you are adding the stress of yourself, but sometimes shopping therapy is not a bad idea. There are people who will tell you otherwise, but a good rule of thumb is, if you are going through something, it’s not a bad idea to treat yourself to something nice. Go out and enjoy your life a bit. Go out to dinner with friends or go on a mini-vacation. If you can afford it and you want it, then go ahead and buy it.
Keep Busy for Your Sobriety
Besides spending time with friends, there are plenty of things you can do to stay busy. Maybe find yourself a new hobby or start exercising regularly. Check out some movies you’ve been wanting to see or binge watch every season of whatever show it is that you like. Don’t just sit alone in your bed accompanied by nothing but the sound of your whimpers. Do something to take your mind off of your woes. Once again, there is nothing wrong with crying and letting your emotions out, but you don’t want to stay in that place for longer than need be.
Are You or a Loved One Struggling with Addiction?
Are you or a loved one struggling with drug addiction or alcoholism? If you or someone you love is suffering from alcohol or drug addiction and want to get help, call us at 1-877-959-7271 today. At Holistic Recovery Centers, we individualize our care around the person’s specific needs. Help is out there and just a phone call away.