Making Recovery the Priority
Table of Contents
The phrase “one day at a time” or “just for today” are cornerstones of 12-step fellowships. When we are in early sobriety, the thought of never being able to drink or use drugs again is a scary thought. These phrases are designed to show to us that all we need to do is focus on how hard we are working towards recovery today.
However, when we start to put in the bare minimum effort, our behaviors shift towards complacency in sobriety, which is extremely dangerous and can quicklylead to a relapse.
What Does Complacency in Sobriety Mean?
The term complacent is defined as,
“Being pleased, especially with oneself or one’s merits, advantages, situation, etc.,often without awareness of some potential dangeror defect; self-satisfied”
When alcoholics and addicts become complacent, we are like a ticking time bomb.
Think about sobriety as an escalator and walking up the downside of it. You are making moves and busting your butt. Once you get to the top, you stop to relax and admire your hard work. Next thing you know, you’re tripping backward over the bump at the bottom of the stairs, and now you’re on your butt, back where you started.
I know it sounds like a lot of work, but the plus side is that getting sober doesn’t require as much cardio, so that’s a bonus. We also have a lot of cool stuff going on instead of just being on a set of stairs. We get friends and jobs and the love of a fellowship and a whole new life.
How Do I Know if I am Being Complacent in Sobriety?
Complacency in sobriety is a scary thing because it can happen to anyone at any length of their sobriety. Here are some sure signs to watch out for regardless of how much sober time you have.
- Rationalizing skipping meetings and fellowship. When you start to hear yourself say, “I don’t need a meeting I’ll go tomorrow or I went yesterday”, this is a red flag.
- Disconnecting from yourhigher power. Whether it’s not praying often or taking your will back, this will only lead to fear and frustration.
- Allowing external gifts to run the show. When we start to get our “ish” together, we forget that we have to keep our diligence to keep our gifts.
- Falling back into old ways, for example, telling little white lies or manipulating others.
So how do we avoid it? How do we ensure that we never slip back from the progress we have made?
It’s actually pretty simple, if you are sure that you have admitted to yourself that you are an addict/alcoholic and your life has become unmanageable, then you will know that you need towork towards your sobrietyas hard as you worked towards getting drunk and high.
Keeping a Sober Focus: Moment by Moment
I know it’s cliché but it’s the simple fact we need to drill into our heads to keep this new life. We can never go back, and all we have to do is focus on making sure that today, we have done what was needed to stay sober.
We can have all of the self-knowledge in the world about our alcoholism/addiction, but if we aren’t willing to do the footwork, we will be in danger of complacency in sobriety.
Now everyone has a different routine, and some people need more discipline than others, but if there is one thing I have learned in my own sobriety, it’s that I feel a whole lot better when I am diligently working my program. Here are the steps that I know that I must take to stay sober.
- Pray and meditate when I wake up. I ask God for help and his will every morning.
- Call my sponsor. Even if I’m just checking in, this is a practice of honesty and humility. When she knows where my head is at, it’s easier for her to call me out when I’m acting on my own will.
- Make a meeting every day. Some days I just wanna relax after work but I always end up feeling better after meetings anyway.
- Doing good for others. Whether it’s through sponsorship or just being a good person, I try to make it a point to be of service throughout the day.
- I write gratitude lists, and this isn’t for everyone but I have found that this is one of the most simple and humbling things I do each day.
- Pray before bed – on my knees, thanking my own Higher Power for keeping me sober.
Again, this is just my ownday-to-day routine, and so far, it hasn’t let me down. All in all, it takes up about 3 hours tops, and out of 24 hours, 3 ain’t so bad.
“It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. We are not cured of alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition.”
– The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous
The dangers of complacency in sobriety are real and can happen to anyone, but they are easily avoided by a day-to-day dedication to ourselves, to others, and to our higher power. Stick with that, and we will never fall short.
Find a Path to Recovery Now!
If you have found yourself suffering from alcohol and/or drugs, you are not alone! If you are ready to change your life and begin or renew your recovery, then Rehabs Of Armerica can help provide options.
We give you a jump start by helping you find accredited treatment centers that meet your needs, no matter where you live in the US. All calls are completely confidential, so please reach out now for a discussion of options and to get started on a path to lasting sobriety today!
FAQs on the Dangers of Complacency in Sobriety
What Are Some More Examples of Complacency in Recovery?
The warning signs of complacency vary from person to person but here are some common indicators:
- Feeling indifferent about attending meetings or therapy sessions
- Not having any goals related to recovery
- Being nonchalant about your progress
- Not setting healthy boundaries
- Feeling entitled
- Not following through with commitments
- Relying too heavily on others for motivation
- Becoming isolated from supportive friends and family members
- Refusing help when offered
- Engaging in self-destructive behaviors such as drinking or using drugs again
It’s important to recognize these signs early on so you can take steps to avoid further complacency down the line.
How Do I Avoid Complacency in Recovery?
Staying sober isn’t easy and staying motivated can be even harder. When you’ve been in recovery for a while, it’s all too easy to become complacent, thinking that you have your sobriety under control and don’t need to stay vigilant. But the truth is that addiction doesn’t go away—it remains dormant until something triggers it to resurface. So how do you maintain a healthy attitude towards sobriety and avoid complacency? Here are some tips.
Set Goals for Your Recovery
When it comes to recovery, setting goals helps to keep us motivated and on track. It can be anything from attending a certain number of meetings each month to abstaining from drugs or alcohol for a certain amount of time. Setting goals gives us something to strive for, which helps us appreciate our accomplishments and recognize any progress we’ve made along the way.
Give Yourself and Others Reasonable Expectations
Setting expectations that are too high can lead to feelings of disappointment if they aren’t met, so make sure that any expectations you set for yourself are achievable within a reasonable timeframe. Focus on smaller successes first and gradually build up from there. Celebrate each small win along the way, as this will help keep your motivation levels up even when progress is slow.
Stay Connected with a Support System
Recovery can be an isolating experience if one does not establish strong support networks or relationships with other people in similar situations. While everyone’s journey is unique, having the opportunity to share experiences with others who understand what you’re going through—and offer encouragement when needed—can make all the difference when striving for long-term sobriety.
Whether it’s attending meetings, joining online groups, or simply having coffee with someone in recovery once a week, being connected helps remind us why we’re putting effort into our sobriety and keeps us accountable in times of temptation or doubt.
Will I Have to Go to AA Meetings Forever?
Many people in recovery from addiction wonder if they’ll be attending meetings forever. This is a valid question with an important answer. While there are many different aspects to addiction recovery, meetings such as 12-step programs and support groups are essential for a successful journey to lasting sobriety. But what role do these meetings play and do they have to play that role forever?
What are the Benefits of AA Meetings and 12-Step Support Groups?
Going to meetings can provide many benefits to someone recovering from addiction. For starters, they offer an opportunity to connect with like-minded people who understand what it feels like to be grappling with an addiction. Having the support of others who have experienced similar struggles can help build resilience and foster positive change.
It also gives you the chance to talk openly about your experiences without feeling judged or embarrassed. Furthermore, you will gain insight into how others have coped with similar issues and learn new strategies that may help you on your journey.
Meetings also provide structure and accountability for those in recovery from addiction—something that is often lacking when you first begin your journey. By attending regular meetings, you will create a sense of routine that can help keep you grounded and focused on your long-term goals. Additionally, being part of a group will give you access to resources such as sponsors or mentors who can provide additional guidance along the way.
When Are 12 Step Meetings Not Needed Anymore?
While attending meetings can be beneficial at any stage of recovery, there may come a time when they are no longer necessary or helpful for your particular situation. As everyone’s experience with addiction is unique, so too is their approach to recovery—and that means there is no one-size-fits-all solution when it comes to meeting attendance.
Ultimately, it is up to each individual in recovery to decide what works best for them based on their own needs and circumstances at any given moment in time.
For some individuals, the need for regular meetings diminishes over time as they become more confident in their ability to manage life without relying on substances or behaviors associated with addiction.
For others, however, attending regular support group sessions remains essential even after many years of sobriety, perhaps forever. All that matters is what works best for each individual person’s unique situation.
Whether you choose to attend regular meetings or not, it’s important to remember that having access to a supportive network of peers and mentors throughout your journey can make all the difference when it comes to achieving lasting sobriety and overall wellbeing.
Charles F. has been an active part of the Florida recovery community for over 5 years. He began as a behavioral health technician at an addiction treatment facility in Ocala, Florida and has since begun training as a Licensed Addiction and Chemical Dependency counselor in Boca Raton. Charles’ passion involves the promotion of recovery and helping spread the hope of recovery to as many readers as possible!
