An Allergy to Alcohol
Table of Contents
The definition of alcoholism centers around the idea that an alcoholic has an obsession of the mind and allergy of the body. An allergy is the body’s abnormal reaction to an external substance. Now, the word abnormal, simply means, well, not normal.
“The idea that somehow, someday he will control and enjoy his drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker… Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death.”
page 30, Alcoholics Anonymous
Since getting sober have you ever watched a normal drinker drink? I have been a waitress for a large part of my sobriety and love to watch normal people. It’s fascinating. They have one drink the whole time, and sometimes they don’t even finish it! Could I ever do that? Nope! Because I am an alcoholic, therefore, an abnormal drinker.
Dedication to Be a Full Blown Alcoholic
There’s a cute little saying in the rooms that once you pickle a cucumber, it can never go back to being a cucumber again. The same goes for alcoholics. We may not have started out our drinking careers as alcoholics, but for many of us, it took hard work and dedication to become full-blown alcoholics. But here we are, and you better believe, that there is no going back.
For years I experimented with dozens of different combinations of booze and uppers and downers, always looking for that sweet spot, hoping to just feel okay in my own skin. I would have a drink with my coworkers after the day was done, and they would go home and cook dinner with their families or go to another job. Whereas my only option was to spend all my tip money that I just busted myself to make, on as much booze and drugs as I could buy.
The next day at work, they would come in well rested and ready for the day. Meanwhile, I still hadn’t slept, probably hadn’t showered, and was definitely waiting on a call from my dude to wake up so I could beg him to spot me until I made enough to pay him back.
I Am Not Normal: And I Have Come to Embrace That Fact
I am not normal, and if you related to that unhappy memory in any way, chances are you probably aren’t either.
So when we come to the rooms, why do we try to convince ourselves that someday we will be able to drink like everyone else? As humans, we want to be able to connect and feel a part of. It’s obvious that the world treats drinking as a way to connect with your fellows.
But guess what, it’s okay to be sober.
I feel like when we are new, many of us have this perception that since we are sober, we are now going to be the “weirdo” in social settings like we won’t be “cool” anymore. Let me ask you something, was it cool when you blacked out and drove home? No. Was it cool when you got into fights with your friends or strangers and couldn’t remember why? No. Was it cool when you spent all of your money and borrowed from friends and family to get your fix? No. Nothing about our drinking careers was cool.
“The delusion that we are like other people, or presently may be, has to be smashed.”
pg 30 Alcoholics Anonymous
This is the essence of Step One, and without help from a higher power, we have no defense against our alcoholism. This is where the next 11 steps will come into play. In the briefest explanation, I can give, Steps 2 and Step 3 will help open you up to your higher power. 4, 5, 6, and 7 help you come to terms with and surrender yourself to that higher power. 8, 9, and 10 allow you to right the wrongs of your past and manage your defects. 11 strengthens your spiritual life. And 12, the golden step, is where you get to help another alcoholic to achieve sobriety!
This life is beautiful today! We get to live today. We get to be helpful and happy and we get to grow into wonderful people.
Being an Alcoholic is One of the Greatest Gifts
I’m glad I’m not normal. Being an alcoholic is one of the greatest gifts that God has ever given to me. The second is that I live in the age of AA. Throughout history, drunks were either locked away or killed for their hopeless states of mind and body. Today, thanks to a couple of brave men and the alcoholics that followed, we have a second chance at life.
Thanks to my new sober life, I get to have real friends today. I get to wake up without being sick today. I get to make money and not put it into my body.
I get to do these things, because I am an alcoholic, and because I put my faith in a higher power to keep me sober.
And you know what? We get to hang out with our friends and not have to get drunk to feel comfortable around them. My old group of friends would be jumping out of their skin if they got together and there was no booze. Most of them would just go home and be by themselves. How sad I feel for the person I used to be.
I’m glad I’m never going to be able to drink normally. I’m glad I never have to use alcohol as a coping method again. It took me a year of constant relapsing to realize this, and every relapse was worse than the last. Do you want to know what I told myself before I went out?
“Well it won’t be like that this time. I’m going to do it the right way. I’ve got it under control”.
“All of us felt at times that we were regaining control, but such intervals – usually brief – were inevitably followed by still less control, which led in time to pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization”.
One Day at a Time for an Alcoholic
I understand this can be a scary thought at first. The idea of never being able to have a drink for the rest of my life?! I get it. I have been there. But try this. Just don’t drink or get high today. The phrases “one day at a time” and “just for today” aren’t just made to decorate the walls. They are words to live by. You don’t have to worry about being sober for the rest of your life, just take it one day at a time.
Freedom From Addiction: Found Here
If you have found yourself suffering from addiction, you are not alone! If you are ready to change your life and live free of addiction, then Rehabs Of Armerica can help. We give you the jump start to recovery through placement at rehab facilities matched to your needs.
Give yourself a break and reach out to our team of recovery representatives for a confidential call today!
Charles F. has been an active part of the Florida recovery community for over 5 years. He began as a behavioral health technician at an addiction treatment facility in Ocala, Florida and has since begun training as a Licensed Addiction and Chemical Dependency counselor in Boca Raton. Charles’ passion involves the promotion of recovery and helping spread the hope of recovery to as many readers as possible!