Dear Addiction to Heroin
Table of Contents
If I could write a letter to my addiction to heroin, it would say this: I really hate you, and I want to tell you all of the reasons why, even if you already know. You destroyed my life. Perhaps we had a good thing going for a short while; but you also made me relive the bad over and over again.
I tried to leave you so many times; but you just dragged me back into your pit of Hell time and time again. You had me convinced that I could do anything that I wanted to. But the real truth was that my addiction to you was always in charge.
Every time I snorted a line, took a pill, or stuck a needle into my arm, it bonded us closer together – which made my addiction even worse, and I finally hit rock bottom. This is my final letter to addiction. Heroin, it’s over.
Heroin – Why I Had to Leave You
Some days, I thought you were what I wanted. Sometimes the drug abuse made me feel great, eased my inhibitions, and made me forget about my own self-contempt. You used to be all I ever thought about.
I started off every day trying to find you because I desperately felt that you could fix all of my problems. I fail now to comprehend why it took me so long to understand that you were the problem. I also question myself on why it took me so long to leave you ultimately.
Maybe it was because when I was at my lowest points, you helped ease that pain; you gave me back a sense of control. Or at least, that’s what I thought, then. But now I know the complete opposite is true. You were what brought me to my lowest; you were what took away my control.
Once I finally realized the toll you had taken on not just my life, but the lives of my friends and family members, I knew it was time to let go. So, consider this my final breakup letter, because I will never again return to the suffering you caused me.
The Tough Path to Sober Living
It’s somewhat embarrassing to admit this, but I would be lying to myself if I claimed that I did not still have feelings towards you. I still fantasize about you sometimes. Getting high with you was an amazing experience; I never cared about the consequences of my behavior.
I didn’t even care that you had zero concerns about what happened to me. Had I overdosed and died, you would have moved on to someone else in less than a heartbeat. But it didn’t matter; I was the person you had chosen at that moment.
Going to score drugs and meeting new people who were in relationships with addiction just like me was a rush. Going into a tough neighborhood filled with dangerous people was always an experience that made me feel invincible.
Once we scored, I knew I would be able to go to sleep that evening. And, if I planned it out just right, I would have enough of you left to wake up and enjoy a morning spent getting high with. I thought we had figured it all out and that we were perfect together.
I can’t fully blame you for everything that happened between us. Addiction is a disease; but I was the one who let it fester for so long. I mistakenly thought that I knew who I was when I was in your presence.
Fortunately, those feelings are in the past; I know better now that I have achieved sobriety. The hardest thing about letting you go was putting myself first. But that decision is what ultimately showed me just how strong I am, and how much I am capable of.
Leaving you helped me focus on restoring my hope in living free from the grip of substance abuse. All of the good things I thought came from you, had come from me all along; you just made me think that I needed you to experience them.
You’re the Drug that Keeps on Taking
Honestly, I don’t really remember exactly when I realized it was over. You made me abandon my sense of right and wrong to keep us together. Whenever I did something illegal for you, I would tell myself it was just one time.
Ours was not a give-and-take relationship. You took away everything I had. I gave you every second of my time, all of my money, my personal values, and my self-worth. I willingly gave you my home, my car, and all of my valuables. All of these things, and it was still not enough for you.
I know I had to get off you and all opiates; but still, our toxic relationship persisted. After all, I was an addict; I was scared of what giving you up would mean for me. How would I begin again, now that I was on my own?
It took me a very long time to realize that no matter how much I gave you, it would never be enough. Over time, you destroyed my career, friendships, family relationship, and my freedom.
I once thought that I could not make it without you. Now, I am able to acknowledge and accept that you were the cause of all my misery and worry. And that, in itself, is extremely therapeutic. That is why I’m writing this goodbye letter to addiction today.
I am hoping this will help give me a final sense of closure, and help support other people who are struggling with substance abuse, just as I once did. I hope this gives them the hope and the motivation they need to finally seek out professional addiction treatment services.
Heroin: My Enslavement by You, is Over!
Once we were forced to spend time apart, I realized that I was spellbound by you. You, heroin, were a magic ingredient, and you kept me doing your evil bidding. I realized that if I continued to see you, I would be enslaved by you forever.
Despite staying away from you, my recovery process from our relationship was riddled with burdens. I remained tortured by your memory. At times, I felt that I would never make it without you; I felt physically ill once we were apart.
My body and my brain both longed to return to your hold, but I had grown strong enough to pull away. After struggling through those first few weeks, I was determined to make a new life; one that did not include you, or any other substance, for that matter.
My Final Letter to Addiction
I consider myself lucky because I didn’t lose my life for you. Unfortunately, I know many who did perish at your hand. They were unable to break free from you. I’m still haunted by your memory despite the knowledge that I’m much better off without you.
I am completely clean and sober now, and that means much more to me than simply just not using you anymore. I now have a new job, and have made new friends through recovery support groups who have broken free from their substance abuse problems, just as I have.
When I struggle through long days and hard nights, they help me get through them. Not for one second will I ever consider running back into your embrace. I guess I should thank you for forcing me into this great new life that I lead.
Yet, I can not help but feel that I wish I had never met you. So, thanks for everything and nothing all at once, heroin. Talking about my past and my path to recovery has been healing; but this is my last goodbye letter to addiction. And this time, I am staying clean.
Finding Addiction Treatment and Writing Your Goodbye Letter
If you or a loved one is struggling with substance abuse, know that you are not alone, and help IS available. At Rehabs Of Armerica, we are dedicated to finding a treatment provider and addiction recovery services that can serve all of your personal care needs.
Our confidential hotline is available 24/7 to help those struggling with substance use disorders to find treatment facilities, counseling services, health insurance verification, and any other addiction treatment support they need, anytime of the day (or night).
So don’t wait; call now, and get started on your path to overcoming addiction and achieving a happier, healthier, and successfully sober you, today!
Letter To Addiction: Saying Goodbye To Heroin (FAQ)
What makes Heroin so addictive?
When you use drugs like Heroin, they activate your brain’s reward system and cause a rush of dopamine — a chemical that helps control the brain’s pleasure and reward centers. The dopamine rush motivates you to repeat the behavior that caused it, in this case, taking the drug.
Is Heroin withdrawal difficult?
Heroin withdrawal symptoms can be challenging to deal with and can last from a few days to weeks, depending on how much heroin was used and how long it has been since you stopped using it. The longer you use heroin, the more severe your withdrawal symptoms will likely be.
How can Heroin addiction affect your life?
Heroin addiction can affect every part of life, including health, relationships, and employment. It can also lead to serious legal consequences such as fines or even jail time. Heroin use is dangerous because it causes immediate effects on the body that can be life-threatening if not treated properly.
How to talk to your loved one about getting treatment for Heroin addiction?
People addicted to heroin often try to quit but cannot do so independently. It’s essential to keep an open mind when talking with your loved one about getting treatment for heroin addiction.
While you may have strong feelings about their use of drugs, remember that this person needs your support — not criticism or judgment — if they’re going to get better. Having a viable option in place for treatment (a facility that is clean and safe) can also help get better results!
Anna M. joined Find Addiction Rehabs with extensive experience in the field of addiction treatment. As a former Nurse Practitioner in Miami, she found her passion for addiction treatment when a family member was lost to his disease. With each article and resource, she hopes to save other families from experiencing the anguish of a loved one’s passing due to drinking or drugs.