Dear Addiction to Heroin

Letter to Addiction | Goodbye to Heroin | Find Addiction Rehabs | Woman looking out rainy windowI really hate you. I’m going to tell you again about some things that you already know. You destroyed my life. Yes, perhaps we had a good thing going on for a short while, but you made me relive bad times over and over again. I tried to leave you so many times, but you dragged me back into your pit of Hell yet again. You convinced me that I could do anything that I wanted to. The real the truth was that my addiction to you was always in charge. Every time I snorted a line, took a pill, or stuck a needle into my arm, it bonded us closer together– which made my addiction even worse.

This my final letter to addiction. Heroin, it’s over.

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Heroin – Why I Had to Leave You

Some days, I thought you were what I wanted. Sometimes you made me feel great, eased my inhibitions, and made me forget about my own self-contempt. You used to be all I ever thought about. I started off every day trying to find you because I desperately felt that you could fix all of my problems. I fail now to comprehend why it took me so long to understand that you were the problem. I also question myself on why it took me so long to leave you ultimately.

The Tough Path to Sober Living

It’s somewhat embarrassing to admit this, but I’d be lying to myself if I claimed that said I didn’t still fantasize about you. Getting high with you was an amazing feeling, I never cared about the consequences of my behavior. I didn’t even care that you didn’t care about what happened to me. Had I overdosed and died, in you would have moved on to someone else in less than a heartbeat. I even loved our daily outings together. Going to score and meeting new people was a rush. Going into a tough neighborhood filled with dangerous people was always an experience that made me feel invincible. Once we scored, I knew I would be able to go to sleep that evening. And, if I planned it out just right, I’d have enough of you left to wake up in the morning and get high. I thought we had figured it all out and that we were perfect together. I mistakenly thought that I knew who I was when I was in your presence. Fortunately, I now know better.

You’re the Drug that Keeps on Taking

I don’t remember exactly when I realized it was over. You made me abandon my sense of right and wrong to keep us together. Whenever I did something illegal for you, I’d tell myself it was just one time. Ours was not a give-and-take relationship. You took away everything I had. I gave you every second of my time, all of my money, my personal values, and my self-worth. I willingly gave you my home, my car, and all my valuables. All that and it was still not enough for you. It took me a very long time to realize that no matter how much I gave you, it would never be enough. Over time, you destroyed my career, friendships, family relationship, and my freedom. I once thought that I couldn’t make it without you. In reality, you were the cause of all my misery. That’s why I’m writing a letter to addiction today.

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Enslaved by You

Once we were forced to spend time apartHeroin Addiction | Addiction to Opiates and Opioids | Find Addiction Rehabs | Paraphanelia for heroin, I realized that you I was spellbound by you. You, heroin, were a magic ingredient, and you kept me doing your evil bidding. I realized that if I continued to see you, I’d be enslaved by you forever. Despite staying away from you, I remained tortured by your memory. At times, I felt that I’d never make it without you, and you made me physically ill once we were apart. My body and my brain both longed to return to your hold, but I had grown strong enough to pull away. After struggling through those first few weeks, I was determined to make a new life, and it did not include you.

My Final Letter to Addiction

I consider myself lucky because I didn’t lose my life for you. Unfortunately, I know many who did perish at your hand. They were unable to break free from you. I’m still haunted by your memory despite the knowledge that I’m much better off without you. I’m clean and sober now, and that means much more to me than merely not using you anymore. I now have made new friends who are grateful and sober, like I am. When I struggle through long days and hard nights, they help me get through them. Not for one second will I ever consider running back into your embrace. I guess I should thank you for forcing me into this great new life that I lead. Yet, I can’t help but feel that I wish I’d never met you.

Thanks for nothing, heroin. This is my last letter to addiction, and this time, I’m staying clean.